You all rock. I had like 40 emails in my inbox and I loved it!! Mostly pictures, lol Eva's face. THE BEST!
I am doing really well today. Really well. I'm just so happy. Sorella Stott and I both are. Man, I don't know what it is, we just feel different.
Well, I guess a few things have happened. We had a scambio, companion exchange, last week. I went to Rimini which is a beach city and I saw the sea. It was amazing! I felt so trapped last year in Milano because I couldn't see water or anything...it was sooo land-y...ya know? I loved being able to smell the salt and feel the breeze. Of course we didn't go on the beach or anything, but it was pretty to see.
We also had the best gelato Ive had in my entire life~ si chiama, (its called) Biscotto della Nonna....GRANDMAS COOKIES! It was great.
Anyway. The sister I was with was really good at talking things out with me. She was trained by Sorella Harward and she is in my MTC group. She was so kind and she gave me a good analogy.
She used to swim and she had a race once where she just kind of eased along. She was a good swimmer so it wasn't hard. Then at the end she had lots of energy and so she ''sprinted to the end''. Her brother, who was kind of like her coach, asked her how she was able to finish so easily. She said ''well I just had all this energy at the end.'' Her brother said, ''that's because you weren't doing your best the whole way through.''
She then explained that I was so tired because I had been going and going the whole way. We cant ''sprint to the end'' in the way that we might want to if we're tired from all the swimming we've already been doing.
Its ok that I'm tired and that I kind of want to stop. It means Ive done my part! Through all of these little analogies that everyone is making, my guilty conscience has been cleared. I understand more fully the Atonement and how Heavenly Father is taking an account of my service. I get that its ok, as long as I don't give up now! 30 days. YEAH! I can do it!
The Elders in our city keep counting down to day 0 for me....but I'm counting up. How many days have I left behind? How many days have a sprinted through...? Freak...I don't know...but I'm tired...and it feels awful and great all at the same time. I'm kind of at the point. when you exercise and your lungs start hurting and your legs feel like jelly but you just kind of feel alive. I feel alive. I feel like we are about to have so many miracles.
This month, being the last. We set a goal to have 12 new investigators and 1 baptism. President asked us to find 3 new people a week and we want to do that. PRAY FOR US PLEASE! We have faith sufficient, and prayers will help us keep going. We're going to do it. I want to do everything I can to help Sorella Stott know that miracles are possible and they happen every day.
We have been doing so well together lately. We pretty much only speak in Italian together. Some English here and there, but mostly of the day is spent speaking Italian. I love it! She loves it too...even though its hard. We had a sweet moment last night too. When I was a trainee, Sorella Hoppe said 'ti voglio bene' every night to me. I don't know why I haven't done it...but I wanted to start because I want Sorella Stott to know that I do love her. I do say ''buona notte'' and that's just become our thing. But last night she said ''ti voglio bene''....and I feel like a total piece of milk toast, but it warmed my heart and it made me feel so good!
We're becoming friends, forever friends, her and I. I really enjoy being her companion. She's a great missionary with lots of amazing ideas and she isn't afraid. She gets that big things can happen, and WILL happen, if we do our part and trust God. Che speciale, no? Also, I told her that after the mission, we're only going to speak together in Italian...so we're excited for that too.
Basically, things are looking up. We were with our investigator Pasqua yesterday, and she says to me ''you look as white as a sheet'' and I just said ''oh I'm just tired''...so obviously its visible how exhausted I am....but I feel more happy and more hopeful than last week and I know Heavenly Father is helping us.
Man...I just want to tell you everything. OH...I'll be giving my 'dying' testimony on Monday. It'll be my last public testimony among missionaries...I'm kind of dreading it...because how could I possibly say anything worth while in a few minutes. Its not enough time...I need at least 45 minutes to share how much the mission has changed me. I am so different....I cant even fathom how different I am from who I was before. You'll be so surprised....its all the little things.
I'm excited to relearn each other, diciamo. I think we'll have a lot of time to just build on our family unit and our faith together. Man...its going to be the best!
Basically....everything is ok for now. I am hopeful and ready to work harder...
Yesterday we left the house at 825 ..we didn't even study...and we got back in at 925pm! 13 hrs! It was the best! I loved it. It made me realize how much of a homebody I was and how much I actually like being outside now. So much is different. Im still not at my old 100% but I'm doing my best for what I can offer now...and Im searching to improve. I'm changing every day!
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Well....thats about it. We went to this BEAUTIFUL...and I mean BEAUTIFULLLLL... catholic church today. It was amazing...not gaudy or dark or creepy...mamma mia, era bellissima!
Look it up
Oratorio
Il transito della vergine
by Alfonso
Its a terracotta statue depiction of Ananias being cast out of somewhere by an angel, mi sembra...non mi ricordo. But anyway it was so beautiful.
We have gone on some good adventures, but we didn't bring the camera SD card adaptor, so we'll send un sacco di foto next week
Know that I love you and that I am praying for you. Every night.
LOVE YOU SO MUCH!
Keep writing and please keep sending pictures. It really makes a difference.
Sorella Carlock
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